TOO HOLY


It was impossible not to be in awe of the tower. It, well, towered over everything else that people had created. It was several times higher than any other magnificent structure in the splendid capital of this glorious realm.

Unlike all the other towers, this one didn't have a name. When you said "the tower" without adding anything, everyone knew what you were talking about.

Currently two men wearing expensive clothes and hats were in a somewhat heated dispute at the edge of the central square.

"What you're saying, Ghidush, is bordering on sacrilege," thundered Trufash, a man in his late thirties with dark brown eyes and sideburns, with a resounding deep voice. "The tower is the symbol of our country's might that is admired across the world."

Ghidush, a somewhat younger man with a mustache and gray eyes, was unimpressed. "I have said it before and will continue to say it: the tower is an appalling testimony to the infinitude of human stupidity. Can you even begin to imagine the amount of resources wasted just because one mad king wanted to study the sky? Besides, it makes me sick to think that the construction was continued for forty years after the tyrant's death. How much misery could have been avoided, had all that work been put to good use?"

"The tower isn't exactly useless. The light on top of it guides the seafarers and has undoubtedly saved many lives."

"Please, Trufash! You know a much lower lighthouse would serve the purpose just as well, and all that firewood wouldn't need to be carried to such insane height all the time."

The older man sighed in frustration. "The lighthouse is only a small part of the good the tower is doing. Look around you. So many people from countries near and far are coming here to see this most amazing wonder of the world. Not only do they spend good money here, a great many people hold this tower as sacred, which gives us strong protection from any potential foreign invasion."

"Maybe so, but the immense costs and human suffering which the construction of the tower caused outweigh the rewards."

"You are forgetting that the suffering and misery you love to talk about is in the past. There isn't anything we can do about it now. But the revenue and reverence we are getting from the pilgrims on a daily basis is benefitting us right now."

Ghidush shook his head. "I'm aghast at the thought that all those people worship something so meaningless. I wish the tower would just disappear."

"Well, it looks like you refuse to see reason," Trufash snapped. "But I'm warning you – don't you dare disrespect the sacred symbol of our country and people in public!" He turned around and left quickly.

When he had reached the other end of the square, his anger had abated somewhat. He noticed his loving wife, Moala in the crowd, modestly dressed in the garb of a married woman that left only her face and hands bare. He smiled fondly and caught up with her. They walked home together.

Late at night in bed, he said to her: "We are truly blessed to have the tower, aren't we?"

"Of course! It's a constant reminder of everything we love and cherish."

He smiled and kissed her fondly. "What does the tower symbolize to you?"

"Why, it looks like a gigantic penis."

Trufash thought he had misheard. "A what?" he exclaimed.

"What's the matter? Didn't you know that women worship the tower as the penis of Gaius, the god of earth? Hundreds of young maidens gather in the woods at the ceremonies to dance naked in His honor. Sometimes it's thousands. And the sight of the tower inspires us every day."

"Naked? Outdoors?" It was fortunate that she couldn't see his face in the darkness, distorted with bewilderment and disgust.

"Does it surprise you?" Moala chuckled. "Well, I suppose it does. We don't tell men about it. But I have no secrets from you. In my younger years, before I got married, I attended the rites whenever I could, to pray to Gaius together with the others," she went on. "I'm very happy I did."

When Trufash didn't reply, Moala reached under the sheets. "You're a lot like Him, you know," she said playfully.

"Please, honey," Trufash replied, similar to the god of earth as he may have been. "I'm exhausted."

Heaven preserve us! he thought before falling asleep. We have to demolish the tower.



(C) Olavi Jaggo
First published: 2023-01-09
This version: 2023-09-07




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